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Bridal Partaaaay

Tentative Hen Do Plans

Aim: People can get to know each other in a relaxed environment
Goal: have inside jokes by the wedding
Numbers: Approx 15-20 people
Cost: Not more than £30 per person

Thursday 5th October

Takeaway dinner at my workplace, which can be made into a cosy long-table venue (see picture). It has a small PA system, projector etc.. Games could be fun.

Friday 6th October

Lunch + Mehendi (henna) function at home. A few people could come earlier to prepare food etc. We eat. And get mehendi put on our hands by professional women. Maybe some people go off to complete a few tasks for the wedding day. Can also discuss some specific roles eg. make sure kids have activity packs, make sure elie’s grandma always has access to a chair.

The Planning Commission

Meet my mum, Seeta.

She was head-girl at her school in India so she got a scholarship to go to college in Wales when she was 16! She didn’t go home for 2 years (!!) and spent a significant amount of time drinking cider in the pub, living with her Danish friend during holidays, (and possibly flirting with Norwegian boys). After college she moved to Paris and learnt French while working as an au pair. She still speaks French fluently. She has worked in offices her whole adult life and is extremely efficient, organised, and clever! She is indispensable to the organisation she works for now, as well as all the family and friends networks she is part of. She is constantly supporting her loved ones and bringing everyone together. She’s everyones favourite, probably because she always finds the good in people. She loves to travel, go out to bougie places, and have a drink (generously poured). Though she sometimes goes overboard on her ‘suggestions’ and doesn’t always understand my sensitive, ‘hippy-ish’ personality, we are very very very close. I love her unbreakable spirit and her ability to laugh whole-heartedly at herself and the world. And I am eternally grateful for how she balances our family dynamics.

Meet Ayesha.

We’ve known each other for 15 years. We met in college in India. I thought she was really cool because she subscribed to Q magazine, was a fashionable indie girl, and had an endearing sarcastic and self-deprecating humour. Ayesha is South African but now lives in her partner’s hometown in South Dakota, USA. She works in senior management roles for NGOs, charities etc. It’s like serious CEO level stuff. She’s also a pro knitter. I love that Ayesha still cracks me up: we have lots of jokes about being South Asian and having depressive personalities. We also both LOVE Indian textiles and home decor tips. Though we have struggled in recent years to make time for each other across continents and timezones, and though Ayesha harbours serious guilt about not having finished my 30th birthday present (a hand-knitted cardigan) which sometimes prevents her from calling me, we persevere because we are like family.

 

Role: Wedding Zine, Signage, Labels etc.

Meet Bethany.

She is the first person who ever interviewed me about FML Comics. She runs an amazing media platform ‘The Sassy Show’ about fabulous womxn all over the world. She makes podcasts, interviews, films, paintings, music, dance choreographies, clothes and much more. She is so good at seeing and unleashing people’s creativity and has created a beautiful community of womxn around her. She bounces around London with an infective creative joy. I love hearing about her adventures, and she patiently listens to my rants. She makes the world feel more free and challenges my stubborn negativity. Together we laugh at ourselves and each other. She’s one of the few people I feel comfortable playing music with and I love the way time disappears when she’s around. Also, She LOVES bread, like really loves it. And always has snacks in her bag, which has a brilliant Mary Poppins vibe.

Role: Photographer

Meet Cassie.

I’ve been fangirling about Cassie for about 10 years. She was the lead singer of a London band called Colin Samurai that I really loved. I fell in love with her beautiful voice the moment I heard it. Later, through our friend Tom, I became her freelance web/marketing person. When I moved back to London in 2019 we started spending time together as friends. She continues to blow my mind with all her varied musical talents but she also teaches me a lot about believing and investing in yourself (she almost convinced me that I should buy the £2500 wedding dress I tried on the other week). She’s always supportive and always inspiring. I love watching her career as a musician and we spend lots of time ‘manifesting’ our future success. Though meeting day-to-day in London is hard because of life’s hustle and bustle, I know Cassie would be there if I really needed her.

Role: Music in Charge

Meet Ernestine.

We also met at college in India. We worked together on two plays, became roommates and then frenemies; I was tidy, she was messy, chaos ensued… Ernestine is from the Netherlands. She currently lives in The Hague, where she also grew up. She is a ‘part-time amateur artist, full-time sick person’. I know her best as a writer (my favourite poet) and a performer but she’s a lot more too. She gave me my first poetry book when we were 16. She’s also really experienced at non-violent communication and organising (politically and otherwise). Ernestine is often the first person I go to for emotional advice or when I’ve made something artistic. Ernestine and Ayesha were the first people to see my comics!

Role: Master of Ceremony

Meet Jenna.

We lived together in my Maida Vale flat while we were doing our BAs in London. We shared a room, a bed, clothes, basically a whole life together for 2 years!! We were inseparable, similarly small, and could be found most Wednesday nights at the Notting Hill Arts Club. Jenna taught me how to be creative with second-hand clothing. Actually she showed me how to embrace my creativity full stop. She is back in Finland now, where she’s from, and also works in the NGO sector, for an organisation that can’t survive without her (though she wish they would try!). When she visits London, we are still inseparable and still very small. Jenna is unbearably cute, really good at being present, and very cosy. I feel at home whenever she’s around.

Role: Head of Decor

The Guest List

Amy
The sister of a Hebridean Island friend, she’s training to be a psychotherapist, always fun to go out with, sometimes you can hear she’s from up North.

Anandini
She’s my fave cousin, a traditional Chinese medicine practitioner, always gives wise advice, lives in San Francisco.

Glaiza
She’s a London friend from Rumi’s Cave, Project Manager/Community organiser extraordinaire, HILARIOUS, West London born bred and thriving.

Marija
Met her while volunteering at a music venue in Copenhagen in 2013, friends ever since, She’s now a Disaster Management specialist, if you’re not careful she’ll do ALL the hard work and not complain once, a Lithuanian living in Denmark.

Milo
I met them in Edinburgh and we became bestie flatmates, they’re a barista turned developer, a perfect homemaker, and the parent of 2 beautiful cats. Hot water bottle, tea, and TV vibes.

Ursula
We met in college in India, spent many nights on broad city like adventures in London, she’s now a Cultural Industries professional and all round creative writer/musician, Daaaanish heart and soul. Brilliant gamesmaster!

Zaisha
Met her in Maida Vale working with people with learning difficulties, she’s an amazing visual artist, lives just outside London. Lovely to be around, always.